Choosing a motorhome

Like Stephen Towell, you may be switching from a caravan, or upgrading from a smaller van; but what are the points that you should consider before making your choice of motorhome?

Here is a personal list of factors and features, intended to create a conversation rather than act as a definitive guide. If you have additional ideas, add your experience and preferences by making a comment below.

‘I have been towing for a few years, but want the flexibility of a motorhome’.

Many on retirement are advised to take a cash sum, opening the door for a more expensive purchase. But how should we approach this big spend when buying a motorhome?

I know few motorhomers who bought their ideal van first time round. You would think that moving from a caravan would give you a head start, but this transition can be as fraught as very first time touring. Motorhomes, especially new ones, are expensive beasts and a mistake can be disastrous. Pete Jones makes an excellent suggestion - consider hiring before you buy. At the very least, on your next campsite introduce yourself to motorhomers with vans that you admire. Unlike the dealers, they will tell you what they like and what they dislike about their van. Go back to your caravan and make notes. You will quickly determine your blueprint for your perfect van.

First considerations

Your first consideration should not be the make and model - but the size of the van.

The larger the van, the more versatile the living space. But with size come downsides, one being a 3,500 kg payload. Phil Cockell rightly mentions the licence restrictions - are you authorised to drive a private goods vehicle? And does the payload gives you sufficient flexibility to carry what you need? To help with this topic, take a look at my earlier blog here.

Size affects the price you will pay. Is it worth paying for extra living space in a leisure vehicle? If you have a hoard of grandchildren all vying to be with you on every trip, the choice is out of your hands. But should just two of you be touring, consider why you wanted to switch from a caravan. For most making the transition, a ‘pitch, pack-up and go’ flexibility is key. Bigger vans (especially twin-axles) will be more difficult to pitch, and definitely more troublesome to park. Smaller vehicles will be easy in supermarket car parks, and a joy when wild camping in the Highlands.

Glenda Benger makes the next important point - take time in determining your ideal interior layout. The main reason that motorhomers change their van in the first two years is that their chosen layout turns out to be wrong for them. Of your time in the van, most will probably be spent in bed. Fixed beds take space, but offer lots of pluses, including the opportunity to use both bed and living space simultaneously. Check accessibility, and think of those dark nights when you need to extract yourself from the bed to visit the loo.

For many, the next priority is the kitchen. You may not be a cordon bleu cook, but the probability is that you will serve more than beans. Here, Glenda’s advice on layout is pivotal. Can others use the van whilst I cook? Will I use an oven? Do I want an electric plate with my hob? Is a microwave a must-have piece of kit? How much work surface do I really need?

Manufacturer, base vehicle and build quality

As with caravans, you ‘pay your money and take your chance’. For each motorhome converter you will find some buyers that criticise and others that eulogise. Even with the latest fabrication techniques, you get rogue vans on dealer’s forecourts. Overall, quality comes at a price, and you should be prepared to pay that bit more for a reliable option. Autotrail has a long history of quality. Many other manufacturers have come and gone. Do a Companies House search on the manufacturer (and the dealer) before you buy, for this will indicate if there are any problems in the wind (as currently with the Hymer Group).

Dealers

My advice is to find a local dealer holding the franchise for your particular choice of motorhome. Then check their trading history. Ask to speak to their after-sales staff, including a member of the handover staff. Visit on a busy weekend and chat with current customers. Check online. Bear in mind that manufacturers will only be responsive to their dealers - the ones that sell their vehicles.

With new motorhomes, remember that you will need an annual service and habitation check to engage the warranty. Well managed, this should require just one annual visit, but repairs and new fittings may result in more frequent trips to your dealer. This is why it is advisable to buy locally from a dealer that you can trust. We were lucky in our most recent choice of Tyne Valley Motorhomes (neither sponsoring nor indeed knowing of this blog entry).

BBQ for motorhomers

The reason we have a motorhome is to access the great outdoors, so it makes total sense to have a barbecue on which we may cook al fresco. The question is ‘what type of BBQ should we get?’.

This blog is not intended to review products on the market, or to make a recommendation. Ask any number of motorhomers and they will have differing personal favourites. Here, we will examine the practical considerations to steer a choice.

In Argentina, Stephanie and I prefer to cook on a charcoal. Not simply traditional, charcoal imparts the perfect smokey flavour that you rarely get elsewhere. However, for a motorhome, burning charcoal is challenging, involving longer lighting and cooking times, fire risk, and on some sites, breach of regulations.

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Which narrows the practical choice to LPG gas BBQs.

Question 1: van gas cylinder, or portable cannister?

Do you have an external BBQ point on your motorhome? Many modern motorhomes have precisely this, conveniently fitted on the awning side of the vehicle, providing simple connection, and for summer and continental travelling, facilitating outdoor cooking using your motorhome’s gas supply.

For those without a fixed van gas outlet, cooking on the beach is made possible with a fully portable system using lightweight disposable gas canisters. However, portable gas is not cheap and will habitually run out after 2-3 hours cooking time. As challenging, some products limit you to a proprietary brand which may be difficult to source on the road.

Question 2: where will I store my BBQ in the van?

For those with larger motorhomes exceeding 3,500 kgs, neither storage of the BBQ nor its weight need be an issue. Those of us with more modest transport should remember that the average quality BBQ weighs the same as a whippet, and with its stand, takes up a similar amount of space. Take a look at the detailed specifications of your proposed purchase, and where possible, view one in real life before you buy.

Question 3: how easy is it to clean?

Imagine this. You are wild camping. There is nowhere to wash or clean your BBQ. What now? Or, you are on one of those posh sites that prohibit the cleaning of BBQs at the washing-up block? Design for cleaning is as important as design for cooking when on the road. Again, take a look at the options face to face and ask for a demonstration.

Question 4: how versatile is it, and do I really need all of the options?

Here, we are considering both size of grill and those added extras such as pizza stones, woks and paella pans. Much depends on how you propose to use your purchase. For how many do I need to cook? Will I be setting it up outside over a period of days and lagely cooking outdoors? Do I need a ‘Jack of all trades’ or the master of one? Cooking a pizza under the awning may seem like a good idea from an armchair at home, but didn’t you already have an oven in your camper? On the other hand, cooking breakfast under the trees, or paella under the stars does sound quite appealing.

Question 5: how to connect my purchase to the van’s gas supply?

An external gas point is massively more sensible than hauling around an 11 kg cylinder; or connecting, disconnecting and storing a 4.7kg version. Gas is ‘on tap’ with safe plug-and-turn connection. But some BBQs are designed for connection direct to a cylinder, so here you may need to make some adaptations.

First, source the appropriate length of high pressure LPG hose (8mm bore / 15mm diameter). This can be purchased from a supplier or online by the metre.

(FLEXIBLE HOSES: Use only approved hoses to BS3212, BS:EN:1763 or equivalent and clips. Keep hose length as short as possible, but sufficient to give you options. All flexible hoses must be secured with proper hose clips. Make sure that the hoses are kept clear of “hot spots” and inspect them from time to time. Replace any hose that shows signs of wear, cracking or damage).

Whilst at your dealers or online, order a quick release 8mm x 8mm fulham nozzle hose connector, enabling you to detach the hose for storage, plus a quantity of 12-20mm Jubilee clips to seal any connections. I also ordered a straight hose joiner, allowing me to connect the new hose to a short length of existing hose attached to my particular appliance. Using my BBQ for home use too, I bought a spare quick release nozzle which I attached to a second section of hose and gas regulator, enabling me to attach the BBQ to a cylinder.

Finally, check out the Gaslow system. It is a pricey addition, but over time should pay for itself both in cost and convenience of refill.

In which I reveal what Henry Vollam Morton has taught me about myself

Touring for six weeks in Scotland with my twentieth century travel buddy Henry Vollam Morton has been an insightful privilege, for which I thank the indulgence of Niall Taylor and H V Morton Society members. The journey has helped me to better understand HVM’s writings; and surprisingly, informed me about myself.

It not simply took me across an autumnal Scotland with ‘In Search of Scotland’ 1928; and ‘In Scotland Again’ 1933 in my bag; but during those six weeks exposed me to much commentary about HVM - Michael Bartholomew, John McCarthy, Walter Mason, Stephen McClarence, Nina Sankovitch, Prof Michael Gardiner - some critical, others sensitive, but all recognising his mastery of his medium.

Few of us have the strength of character that we expect of other’s unblemished lives - the myth of ‘the perfect gentleman’. But does unvarnished biographical reconstruction steal away a writer’s magic; and has it affected my fascination with HVM?

Retrospective judgment of character is an acid tool. Social mores change, and evolve (or regress). To appreciate the writing, do we really need to know about the writer? To view a man in the time of his life, shouldn’t we enter ‘both the man and the time’? For some of Morton’s biographical commentators this has seemed an impossible task, causing me to question their motivation (and morality).

In my travels with Henry, I focused simply on his writing not personality. The character that accompanied me was the Henry Vollam Morton discovered from his work, the one that charmed and captivated contemporary society and has seduced travellers since. For me, his is an identity described without critique, displayed solely from his words.

In my opening paragraph I mentioned that the journey also informed me about myself. It may appear strange that a senior twenty first century barrister would gain personal insight from the writings of a mid-twentieth century travel writer. The insight relates to my responses to our shared travels. In a nutshell, under Henry’s influence it was increasingly difficult (and unnecessary) to remain objective and factual about what I saw and felt - and in consequence what I wrote.

It was not until I fictionally ‘introduced’ HVM to Robert Louis Stevenson on the banks of Loch Linnhe that I realised what was happening. At the Corran ferry I gazed out at the glory of the Highlands, the silhouettes of mountains peeling away from the stillness of the loch. Perhaps I should have anticipated my emotional response to the landscape from the romantic writings of Robert Burns and Walter Scott; or more latterly, Mike Tomkies’ “A Last Wild Place’ and Amy Liptrot’s ‘The Outrun’. Tales of Scotland are necessarily historical romance rather than simple historical fact. Each observation and memory has woven into its core a peat-flavoured thread of heart-pounding fiction, not always intentional, but inescapable. It is impossible to write about the Highlands without the romance; for the stark realities of one moment evaporate on the suffused colour and countours of the next.

Detractors have tested HVM’s writing against a template of their perceived reality. Did he actually walk the fells above Loch Nan Uamh, rest at the Loch Sligachan inn, meet the Highlander Campbell in Glencoe? I sense that the answer to that question -  is to question the question. Was it ever relevant? Did his readers wish to know, or simply believe? Like me, and many Mortonites like me, they simply sought to submerge themselves in his prose - to feel the wind against their faces, to smell the heather and to hear the call of the curlew across the fell. Henry was walking in the steps of the romantics, Burns and Stevenson; that is what Morton invited me to do, and it is precisely why we love what he wrote.

I have sought to capture the fusion of fact and fiction, where time stops and starts again, in a place where Henry and I indulged ourselves in the almost real romance of yesteryear.

In which Henry meets an old friend on the banks of Loch Linnhe

Whilst driving the road from Killin to Crianlarich Henry Morton announced that he had received a letter from a man named Robert Louis Stevenson who he now planned to meet on the shore of Loch Linnhe. He muttered something about '1751, David Balfour, and the British Linen Company', but his words were kidnapped in a gust of wind from the open window of the bull nose Morris, pulling a cloud of smoke from Henry’s teeth-clenched pipe.

Leaving Achallader in the Morris, we head towards Glencoe. Would Henry recognise today's Glencoe?, I thought to myself.  Might he continue to marvel at a 'landscape without mercy...still dreaming of geological convulsions?'

The mountains that border Glencoe remain to this day ominous and overbearing. There is drama - simply from the inescapable landscape. But what of man's efforts to tame the journey? I sensed that Henry might be saddened. Civil engineers have cured 'the worst road in Scotland.. that winds its way through the solitude'; but with the cure, comes the crowd. Yes, the glen is busy as we journey on a September morning - still preserved and uninhabited, but with coaches and motorhomes delivering tourists rather than travellers. HVM's shepherd no longer walks his sheep in a 'grey wave over the grass on invisible feet. Enchanting Dianas no longer visit in breeches and dubbined boots'. And, despite Henry and I singing 'D'ye ken John Peel with his coat so gay' we fail to spot the Highlander Campbell in Crianlarich, or on the mountain above.

So we leave the glen behind and reach Loch Leven where the road swings to the west along its southern shore which will take us through North Ballachulish, on to Onich and Loch Linnhe.

As we approach Loch Leven Henry picks up his 1933 copy of  ‘In Scotland Again’ and reads aloud from chapter 6 section 3, 'dark mountains rising from a tidal loch, ridges of trees marching the hills like regiments, the mountains piling up in the distance towards the gloomy fastnesses of Glencoe and Lochaber, the whole scene mirrored in sleety-grey water ruffled at the edges by a fresh wind and swirling in a central channel with an incoming tide'.

At the Loch Leven crossing we search for Henry's ferry boatman; but instead we see but an expanse of box bridge. The Highlands are surely tamed. We miss 'the ferryman's Ancient Mariner's eye' and the Renfrewshire traveller. How times change.

Now Loch Linnhe spreads before us, with a stretch of pure white sand in the distance. As we approach, a lone figure comes into view. Might this be Robert Louis Stevenson? He is soberly dressed, but a single silver button stitched to his lapel catches the autumn sun.

I watch as HVM greets his friend, and they walk slowly to a small house standing alone by the shore of the Linnhe Loch. 'The sun was already gone from the desert mountains of Ardgour upon the hither side, but shone on those of Appin on the farther; the loch lay as still as a lake, only the gulls were crying round the sides of it; and the whole place seemed solemn and uncouth'.

That evening, over a glass of Talisker in the spitting light of a log fire, RLS tells his story of David Balfour’s exploits on the banks of Linnhe. 'It was near noon before we set out; a dark day with clouds, and the sun shining upon little patches. The sea was here very deep and still, and had scarce a wave upon it; so that I must put the water to my lips before I could believe it to be truly salt. The mountains on either side were high, rough and barren, very black and gloomy in the shadow of the clouds, but all silver-laced with little watercourses where the sun shone upon them. It seemed a hard country. There was but one thing to mention. A little after we had started, the sun shone upon a little moving clump of scarlet close in along the water-side to the north. It was much of the same red as soldiers' coats; every now and then, too, there came little sparks and lightnings, as though the sun had struck upon bright steel'.

Beyond 'a wood of birches, growing on a steep, craggy side of a mountain that overhung the loch. It had many openings and ferny howes; and a road or bridle track ran north and south through the midst of it, by the edge of which, where was a spring, I sat down to eat some oat-bread of Mr. Henderland's and think upon my situation'.

Smoke curls from Henry’s pipe; our glasses clatter on the wooden table and an empty bottle of Talisker 1956 Cask catches the fire’s dying embers. RLS rises to extinguish the gas lamp, pulling the low door closed as we depart the cottage. Robert heads off into the darkness by the loch, whilst we ascend the bank to where our bull-nosed Morris is parked.

'A magical night', says HVM as he swings his failing legs into the passenger footwell and pulls on his seat belt. 'Fancy that, there was only two years between us, you know', he continues, '26 July 1892 to 3 December 1894'. I frown with confusion, but as we turn towards Onich and the Corran ferry I realise how time can play tricks.

In which Henry and I dine at the Courie Inn, Killin

When I returned to the table, Henry Morton was deep in conversation. “What are you up to H V?”, I ask. “Just speaking in Greek with Elleeni”, he replies.”Do you know, I haven’t had such an opportunity since researching ‘In the Steps of St Paul’ (Rich & Cowan October 1936), in which I retraced Paul’s journey from Tarsus, via the Areopagus sermon, to the scene of his martyrdom in Rome?”. “And brushing up my rusty Greek is made better by the fact that our waitress Elleeni is so young and beautiful”, he adds with a devastating 20th century smile, causing both her, and me, to blush.

It was H V’s idea to venture out to the Courie Inn in Killin in the heart of Perthshire. “I want to taste true Scotland again”, he asserted, “and somewhere different from those drafty old hotels I encountered in 1929 Dumfries and Galloway”.

‘Courie’ - Scots for ‘snuggle or nestle’, describes this place to perfection. I could see immediately its fascination for Henry. Hotel, bar and restaurant snuggling to the east edge of Sron a’ Chlachain just a little way from the Falls of Dochart at the head of Loch Tay. To get there we have hired a 1920 bullnose Morris (that Henry insists on calling ‘Maud’ for some reason) which we park at the village hall, and walk down to the inn.

Ms Jinny, Courie’s young manageress, had reserved a window table to allow H V to observe the comings and goings, and, as he is wont to do, to make the odd jotting in his notebook.

At Henry’s insistence we share a ‘Wee Tasty’ - haggis, Stornoway black pudding and a wee tattie scone. “This is Scotland in perfect parcels”, announces H V as he pours creamy whisky and chive sauce.  Our main dish is succulent, tender Lamb rump on a bed of mash, peas and roasted vegetables.

“All good inns should possess a boast”, he asserts as he scribbles in his notebook, “and Courie Inn’s boast is the most divine food served by two angels”. “When you write about it, remember to tell them I said so”, he adds wistfully. And so, faithfully, I do.

Replete, we depart Courie Inn through the public bar and its lively group of locals and visitors chatting to the sound of draft beer being pulled from the cask. Outside, low cloud has descended in the darkness, and mizzle drifts sideways across pavement flags.

“Tomorrow, if it is fine, we shall need to walk off our supper”, reflects HV, “now, which of the Munros should we scale?”, he continues, “Ben Lawers or Beinn Ghlas?”.

“Let’s find the car and leave tomorrow to take care of itself”, I reply, as we splash our way out along the Main Street in the direction of Fingal Stone and the loch.

In which Henry takes me to Wigtown for a book

“Before we head up to Ayr we should take the bus to Wigtown”, says H V, “and I will educate you ‘twenty first century www’s’ on exactly what you are missing”. “They are things called ‘books’, and I insist that you do not leave Galloway without owning one; or at least feeling one in your hand”.

To emphasise the point Henry points to the letters FRSL after his name. “Fellow of the Royal Society of Literature”, he whispers discretely. “Order of the Phoenix Greece, and Order of Merit of the Italian Republic too”, he adds, “although I don’t speak about the latter since Italy became so liberal”. “And if you are a good student, I will treat you to a half of best bitter in the ‘Galloway Bar’ in the Main Street of Scotland’s Book Town”.

To see a country, you have to put on your boots, cut a stout walking stick from the hedge, brave the elements, and tramp with the feet of the curious. Alternatively, you wave down a bus. So that is precisely what H V and I did, taking window seats towards the back to afford a better view of the Galloway countryside. It is rich and lush. Rainfall ensures that it is washed and verdant. From our perch we look east to the blue sea and west into the low lying green hills of Wigtownshire.

Shortly after crossing the River Bladnoch (with its new distillery bearing the sign ‘Closed to the Public’), we enter Wigtown from the south and alight by the inn. Ahead is a seriously elegant town boasting a huge Main Street. Here, no matter what the shop, it features books. Henry smiles. “It is like stepping back to 1933”, he says as he leads me to ‘The Book Shop’ - the largest for second hand books in Scotland. 

  

Within moments I loose H V amongst a thousand dusty tomes, later to see him holding a wooden ladder on which a young girl is doing his bidding to retrieve a lost 1929 first edition of  ‘In Search of Scotland’. 

  

Beltie Books comes next, where tea, scones and jam delaying our desire for a pint. And then we descend towards the ancient Parish Church of Machutus. “Solitary penance; prayer and mortification; let us leave St Machutus to his fate and go cheer ourselves by the bay”, remarks H V as he closes the old oak door, turning to his left and ignoring two commemorative marbles bearing the names ‘Margaret’.

There was a dispute in the 17th century between the Church and the Monarchy.  It is 1685. The King, now ruling over both England and Scotland, forced Episcopalianism on Scotland;  the people who refused this imposition, having signed a Covenant together to do so, became known as Covenanters. The campaign against the Covenanters escalated, with rulings, legislation, and sanctions such as fines, banishment and finally the execution of ‘The Wigtown Martyrs’.

 

Margaret and Agnes Wilson were the daughters of Gilbert Wilson, a prosperous farmer. Gilbert and his wife conformed, and attended Episcopalian services in the parish church. Their children  refused, so their father was fined by the Courts, and had soldiers billeted upon him. They stole his stock and possessions leaving him all but ruined.

With the death of Charles II in February 1685, there was hope for a lull in persecution.  The young Wilson girls, Margaret and Agnes, came down from the hills to live with Margaret McLachlan, a 63 year old widow.  A local man betrayed them when they came into Wigtown, and the two girls were taken prisoner.  At the same time, Margaret McLachlan was seized while at prayer in her own home.  The women were required to take the Oath of Abjuration which, a year earlier on the order of the Privy Council, had been administered to everyone in the County over the age of 13 years.  

Refusal to swear the Oath allowed execution without trial;  men could be hanged or shot;  a new sentence had been introduced for women:  death by drowning.  The women refused the Oath and were brought before the Commission.  The Commissioners, described as ‘five of the most vicious scoundrels in Scotland’ found the three women guilty on all charges and they sentenced them  ‘to be tyed to palisadoes and fixed in the sand, within the flood mark, at the mouth of the Blednoch stream, and there to stand till the flood over flowed them, and [they] drowned”. Agnes (aged only thirteen at the time) was reprieved when her father promised to pay a huge bond of £100.

On 30 April 1685, a pardon was issued in Edinburgh for the two Margarets.  It mysteriously disappeared.  The women were taken out and tied to stakes in the waters of the Bladnoch on 11 May 1685.  The older woman was tied deeper in the river channel forcing 18 year old Margaret to witness her death, in the hope that she would relent.  Instead, she seemed to take strength from the older woman’s fate, singing a psalm, and quoting scripture.

The Penninghame parish records say that Margaret Wilson’s head was held up from the water, beseaching her to pray for the King.  She answered that she wished the salvation of all men, but the damnation of none.

The Kirkinner records state that Margaret McLachan’s head had been “held down within the water by one of the town officers by his halberd at her throat, til she died”.  A popular account adds that the officer said “then tak’ another drink o’t my hearty”.  Legend has it that for the rest of his life the man had an unquenchable thirst, and had to stop and drink from every ditch, stream, or tap he passed, and he was deserted by his friends.

Henry and I gaze out across the now boggy marsh beyone the cross marking the place of execution. Gulls rise in the distance and two black crows cawk from a nearby ash. A chill breeze blows through the willows. 

“We had better go for that earlier bus”, says HV. “Somehow, I no longer have the desire for a pint in the Galloway Inn”, he continues, pulling down his felt fedora and knocking the bowl of his pipe against the wooden rail.

In which Henry tells me about McGuffog

Overnight a sharp, wild wind cuts through the gorse and briars where we camp, and rain lashes the roof of the Tracker making a thundering sound, reminding Henry of the night in 1929 that he was blown into Kirkcudbright. Then, he recounts,  the wind shuddered at windows and doors of the little town, sweeping round corners with the fury of an invading army.

This morning, here, the same gorse and briars are decorated with finches harvesting blackberries. Quiet in warm sunshine, ahead of us ripples the Bay of Galloway, and afar side, rise the hills beyond Auchenmaig on the Whithorn peninsula.

H V (as Henry insists that I call him) takes a long draw on his pipe emitting a cloud of tobacco smoke to disperse a column of Scottish midges. He squints out over the bay. “Pass me the binoculars, would you please”, he calls as he gazes out to the little fishing skiffs hunting mackerel. “I wonder, can we see the Merrick from here?”, he questions.“We should be able to do so on such a clear day. It is the highest hill in the south of Scotland, and is generally observed dozing in a white cloud like an old man asleep under a handkerchief. Sometimes, when he awakes with his head in the light of the sun, foolish people like myself think to outwit the old gentleman and so, grasping our sticks, we set off in his direction with great dispatch and vigour, but lo, in the twinkling of an eye the Merrick whistles towards the Atlantic and up comes a cloud which he promptly assumes”. 

“Did you know that the meaning of Galloway is ‘Land of the Stranger Gaels?”, he continues,  “It comes from Gall, a stranger, and Gaidhel, the Gaels.”

“I believe over there, south and deep inland lies the little town of Wigtown?”, he muses. “Was it Wigtown - or another Galloway town where I saw the name of ‘McGuffog’ written over a shop? I made enquiries about what was to me, an unknown clan; but no-one seemed to think it at all interesting or remarkable”.  “At the time I even looked it up in the local telephone directory. Do such things still exist, I wonder?” 

“Give me a moment, HV; I will check that name out on the internet”, I reply as I turn back to the wifi zone of the campervan. “Internet? That’s a truly ugly word if you don’t mind me saying”, calls H V. “All the more reason for us to take the road to Wigtown”, he adds. “Isn’t it now the book-town of Scotland?”

I leave HV with his thoughts of books and Wigtown, and search for ‘McGuffog’ on the ipad.

‘Recorded in the spellings of MacGuffog, MacGuffie and MacCuffie, but more generally in the short forms McGuffog, McGuffolk, McGuffie and McCaffie, this is an early Scottish surname. It is unclear as to the origin, which may be locational from an estate called Guffokland, believed to have been near Stewarton in Argylshire, or possibly a patronymic from the early Gaelic name MacDabhog, which translates as the son of David. It is said that the family of McGuffok were once very powerful in Central Galloway, with Patrik McGuffok being a herald on behalf of Sir Robert Bruce, and making statements on his behalf in the year 1291. It was probably his son as Richard McCuffok, who in 1329 was confirmed as the owner of lands in "Kelinsture and Cloentes" for services to King Robert, The Bruce (1306 - 1329). Other recordings from that period showing an early spread of the name through the country include: John McCoffot, the rector of Gewilston in Galloway in 1347, Ellen McGuffok in Aberdeen in 1376, and Thomas M'Guffok, who is recorded as being secretary to Margaret, the countess of Douglas, in 1429. The name spelling as McGuffie is apparently first recorded in 1513 when Colonel John McGuffie, was one of the list of Scottish officers killed at the battle of Flodden in 1513, whilst in 1570 a Provost M'Guffie was recorded in Wigtown, and John M'Kuffie in yet another variation of the spelling, was a councillor at Kircudbright’.

HV glances over my shoulder. “Now you have the information; but unless you write it down for posterity, your efforts and thoughts will be little more memorable than those of Devorgilla”, he chides.